>>101536 >There's a tea party in my pants That just sounds like you peed yourself.

I'm convinced down to my bones that the best way to get rich in a post-mamono world, other than opening up a dating service, is to sell monster girl-friendly furniture. Like, let's disregard the fact that so many different monster girls are considerably bigger than regular-sized humans (dragons, oni, hellhounds, etc.) or have physical shapes that no way adhere to the human body plan (weresharks, lamias, etc.) even roughly human-sized and human-shaped mamono are in need of furniture that can stand up to their monstrous physiques. Just take the mad hatter in the pic at the top of the thread; do you believe that there's a single chair sold in stores that could stand up to the sheer quantity of her enormous ass, or a single bed that could withstand the sheer force of her screwing some guy's brains out without being reduced to splinters? No, you need a better grade of furniture for that, and you'd make a shit ton of money if you did so.

Maids! Maids in dirndls!

>>101539 OH NO! DIRNDLS! MY SINGULAR SOFT SPOT!

>>101541 >SINGULAR > >>

>>101538 The industrial strength hammock or Kevlar bean-bag chair is making a comeback.

>>101545 Why did it ever go out of fashion?

>>101538 It's impossible, it can't be done, there's a reason she's contained in the topsy-turvy funnyworld instead of the real world, thank god.

>>101539 Fine, but I'm not ogling until I know they're actual maids instead of random tittymonsters in costume.

>>101548 Random tittymonsters in costume are just maids waiting to happen. You have to will it.

I DO NOT SERVE I COOK

>>101550 Do not let them cook

>>101539 >come home after working overtime on Saturday >kiki meido ina dirndl serves a fresh homemade pizza and a pint of beer it hurts. Hey Babayag, where is my kiki meido in a dirndl to love and cherish?

>>101552 Druella already opened the portals but she got stuck because her ass was too fat and they can't get her out.

high temperature canine

>>101555 Helldogs becoming increasingly unpopular as the heat rises.

>>101553 maids...

>>101557 (Dead) maids...

>>101556 Too many summoning mishaps causing spikes in both temperature and hound population Scientists baffled

>>101557 Cute cat.

Speaking of maids, you should ask your Shoggoth to try out different styles. You'll be surprised how fashionable she can be! Shoggoths really got a drip.

>>101558 My favorite

Wights are cool. A very useful trait in summer.

>>101550 I've worked in a kitchen before, how the hell am i meant to work around a horse? she'll be longer than the aisle and probably as wide

>>101564 Short teleportation spell.

>>101566 OK, how short do you have to be for it to work? I'm 5'3", is that still too tall?

There are Anons dense enough to not understand this kind of signal.

>>101570 Is that a decapitation scar on her neck? I kinda want to lick it

>>101570 Maybe she''s just being polite. She could be Canadian.

>>101570 It's not that I don't understand; it's that she's not a cat.

You ever watch a ghoul eat a watermelon? You ever watch one destroy a watermelon with her thighs? It’s very messy.

>>101575 You ever seen a ghoul crush a watermelon with her thighs, then clean up the whole mess without using her hands?

>>101576 That entire time you are thinking >I wish she were licking the watermelon off me

Greenworm carrot eating ASMR

Hey bby mebbe I cld b ur watermelon

>>101578 There is a niche for this kind of material I'm sure. I've watched a few of those "pig eats slop" videos

>>101578 Did someone say corn time?! >>101580 Comparing a greenworm with a pig is crazy stuff. Consider yourself green'd if the portals ever open. The Rape correction you're going to get will be written in the books of history.

>>101579 "But anon, then I'd have to eat you," cries the ghoul.

How's everyone holding up with the heat. Remember to drink plenty of water, even if it tastes a bit fuzzy.

Maid are mandatory in MGC and it's good thing, you never have enough, never.

>>101583 Undines and the elementals in general are so rarely discussed

>>101583 I hear rivers are good to cool off in. Watch out for sahus.

>>101585 There's a lot that's underdiscussed. What is there more to say about a water elemental, other than annoy her about you "drowning in those thighs", or have her absorb water to make her boobs bigger. Maybe a couple of them have a job where they have mobile Oasis created by their own magic and go around in the desert lands looking for adventurers that fainted from heat exhaustion.

>>101558 >convincing your noble monster loli gf to wear a sexy servant cosplay outfit

>>101587 We must ask the Undine if the glass is half full or half empty.

>>101589 She'll think you want it completely full and fill it for you.

>>101589 <"I'm not a fucking haku. Stop asking me stupid questions or we're going to be discussing soon if your balls are half full or half empty"

>>101591 Upset Undine is like a storm in a water glass

>>101592 Be careful, that glass could spill out the storm any time, and it's going to get you wet.

Undead kingdoms must be immensely popular to visit during heatwaves, seeing as it's always night and probably chilly as hell regardless of the time of year.

>>101589 She will just smile at you as she puts the water at its triple point

>>101595 Scary...

>>101591 But I want them completely empty. Undine is one of only a few girls who can't dry fish you.

dragon, when insulted, throws bronze coins at people's heads as that's how much they are worth

>>101598 >Annoy Dragon >She throws a bronze coin at me. >I've been certified by a Dragon to not be worthless. I see that as a win.

Who is even minting all this metal into coins for the dragons? or is it STOLEN!?

>>101599 >annoy the same dragon multiple times >obtain many bronze coins >each time your value increases

remember to pull your ocelomehs every now and again. do not the ocelomeh.

>>101602 You only throw pillow or boots at them when they're yowling at night

>>101600 Not stolen, finessed. Forcefully.

Evil white-haired women is my fetish.

>>101605 but how do you know that shes evil?

>>101606 Kind of music playing in the background of her (evil) speeches is a clue.

>The downside to letting your wife wear your shirts Remember, women’s tops are usually elastic for a reason. I hope none of you have clothes with text like that on it, but you get the point.

>>101608 >melancholy piano music: tragic villain hiding her vulnerability behind a mask >pompous string music: an over-the-top melodramatic villain who loves to perform >a choir chanting in some exotic language (or singing the credits backwards like in Mask of the Phantasm: a megalomaniacal villain >eerie banjo: rapist villain

>>101605 Would worship titty malef.

>>101606 She's the head of the HOA in her neighborhood. Really, you can't be more evil than that.

>>101605 To correct them, right anon?

>>101612 Man, I hate unsympathetically evil villains. At least try to make them believable.

pirates!

>>101615 Piracy is a crime! Crime is bad!

>>101616 All she wants to raid is anon's fridge.

>>101612 >oh my, looks like your garden ornament isnt on the approved list~ >dont worry we can work something out. >may i come in?

>>101600 >Who is even minting all this metal into coins for the dragons? Oh that's easy to explain

>>101619 THEIR TWILIGHT CAMPAIGN IS EASY TO EXPLAIN

>>101619 Imagine being their slave... hot.

>>101619 A worse value package deal

>>101606 listen to their laugh pattern kukuku is a bad one

>>101623 "bad" in what way?

>>101623 That's just fox noises, can't be bad

>>101625 you're dead wrong

>>101626 I don't get it, she's doing her job so it's not a bad fox

>>101622 What are better value package deals? >Gandharva and apsara >Kamaitachi >Holst and troll >Lava golem and ice queen

>>101628 Gremlin and automaton

what is a mad hatter without her hat?

>>101628 >dhamp and vamp >sally and liz Stuck between their constant squabbling, will never have a moment of peace and quiet again. Also lich and vamp, because its cute

>>101627 the insurance she sells you also includes "bloodline prosperity guarantee". if you sign up, she'll sneak into your bed on the same night and rape you.

>>101630 Mad

>>101605 I love fixing evil women

>>101632 It's the only way to ensure that I have a bloodline. Perfectly logical, that. >>101631 I would love to be stuck between those two female lizards. They're so meaty, and I'm sure they'd train me to be so lean.

>>101632 Not if I catch and sex her first

>>101568 no, short as in distance and cooldown. like a Blink Dagger but even smaller, a Blink ButterKnife if you will. Real timesaver even if you're alone in the kitchen, too. My Kikimora maid has one, she says that's how she manages to do all the maidly duties in the same day each day, compared to how I have to set aside specific days for when i clean the floor or cook food for the week or so on.

>>101634 Lolibabas are the best, I want to make so many children with a lolibaba until both team of a soccer field are filled with my daughters

>>101637 Anon, she’s just good at her job and trying to avoid calling out that you’re not.

>>101606 i'm sure she's just misunderstood

>>101630 Mad Teater.

>>101628 >Wight and Pharaoh >Demon and Apophis >Kunoichi and Ochimusha The reasoning for this based on: my dick

>>101628 as an aspiring villain i'd want an imp, a familiar and a hobgoblin as my minions

>>101628 Imagine the rape.

>>101642 >Demon and Apophis That sounds incredibly dangerous and I wish the three of you all the best.

>>101645 >Sloppily making out with an Apophis and demon in a double purple sandwich >Demon is taller than you and apophis is a snake >So, your legs are dangling off the floor, suspended by the volume of their boobs and hips alone >Know it will stay relatively tempered and simmering >until grapesnek bites >get pushed down for just a moment >while you melt between two great, steamy purple pair of tits, apophis and demon kiss >apophis bites demon >resurface from cleavage >tempered and simmering is now boiling >magic kisses. lipstick kisses. sex with one while the other toys with your butt >everything you see is tinted with purple. your brain starts breaking. your pupils become dull hearts. >they giggle at the feeble resistance your tongue puts up, and soon enough your entire being, from body to senses to soul, are devoured by the demon and the snake

>>101646 >while the other toys with your butt An alp, a Demon and an Apophis

>>101646 Why make it gay

>>101628 Apophis and Basilisk

>>101639 but i have seen her teleport! its true! why won't anybody believe me when i say that even the lowliest mamono have magic on their side?!

>>101653 Look, no one ever believes me about the gremlin on the wing, they'll never believe you have a teleporting maid. At least say she has a magic flying umbrella, there's precedent for that.

>>101628 apophis twins

>>101645 More dangerous combinations >Hellhound and Krampus >Ice Queen and Balrog

>>101656 vampire and vampire mosquito

>>101656 >Hellhound and Krampus You might as well just have a Lich on standby at that point.

>>101656 Good cop kobold, bad cop hellhound.

>>101658 No, you'd be fine. Canonhound would just be enthusiastic unless you'd tried to bone to her exhaustion first and krampus would be gleefully doing your favorite things, not trying to wring you dry. They'd be tiring, but you'd be saved from death by the gold star aftercare. >Hound giving you lots of kisses and licking off your sweat >Krampus hand feeding you your favorite sandwich and spiny ng cool fruit juice intonyour mouth Worth.

>>101659 >they keep mixing up which one is supposed to be the good cop and which one is supposed to be the bad cop

>>101628 Any combination of ren, holst, and ghoul would be great too, can me to think. You will have ALL of the foreplay.

>>101660 I don't doubt at all that the aftercare would be fantastic, it's just that, well, if you have two giant monster girls who are both pure muscle and have claws and teeth and all that stuff, it just seems inevitable that anyone in between the two at the same time when they're both in full horny mood would almost inevitable suffer some sort of grievous injury.

>>101663 Is mindbreak a grievous injury? Because that's certainly a double peace sign scenario at least. Oh, speaking of mindbreak >Mindflayer and phantom

>>101665 it's just a run of the mill status effect like slimed, poisoned, marked, petrified, grappled, paralyzed, enchanted, bewitched, charmed or addicted

>>101666 That moth is cute. CUTE!

>>101666 Nice digits satan, My favorite status effect is 'Under Contract'

>>101669 That's not a status effect, Contractor a class, like Rogue, Farmer, or Chair. It doesn't make your character very strong, but like Warlock it still gives you access to powerful magic... If your wife approves.

>>101669 level drained soul burned tainted happy

>>101628 Orc and Troll Dorome and Troll

>>101672 I was thinking about trolls and orcs, among others. There are a few smell fetish monsters that would fuck you right up if you were in a room with two of them. Smells--er, sounds nice.

I was thinking about genki dog girls with big fat titties

>>101538 You're completely disregarding the male portion of market. From charms, potions, love spells etc. to attract certain kinds of monsters, to guns, turrets, electric holo-fences, missile launchers and all other self-defense hardware for those who do NOT want to marry anyone right now. Whoever gets into any area of this business, gets LOADS of money.

>>101570 Well, it's the heat wave and she wants to cool off.

>>101675 How big of a market is that, though? Considering how *enthusiastic* mamono are about finding their partners, the majority of single men will have been swooped up posthaste, so you're basically catering to a much tinier market. Also, trying to sell self-defense stuff to single men sounds like a really good way to have a kunoichi disappear you in the middle of the night.

>>101677 Judging by the majority of MGE-tagged AO3 fics, and the amount of kudos for them, the fraction of single men unwilling to engage in somewhat forcible relations with monsters is not that small. >kunoichi Doesn't sound very bad. But, we'll have to make a living somehow, even post-marriage, so I guess the gun trade will come back shortly after I get out from under her hips.

>>101678 i don't know, those guys kind of sound like they secretly want to fuck spiders

>>101679 To you, anon, everybody looks like they secretly want to fuck spiders.

>>101680 there's also anons honest with themselves

>>101681 Like I said, it's just your perspective.

>>101675 >>101677 It's 2 sides of the same coin. >The Anons who buy charms and potions and whatnot to attract the ideal mate are making the OBVIOUS play. <The Anons who buy guns, turrets, etc are ALSO attracting the ideal mate, just differently. <Anon sets up an unimpregnable fortress >To attract a stealthy kunoichi to steal him away <Anon covers himself in curses and seals to prevent any woman from touching him >Miss Lich researches all his defenses and slowly peels them away, one by one <Anon becomes a horrible reprobate, impossible to love due to his attitude and behavior >Gets Angelic correction <Anon starts a pest control company >Gets harem of bugs whether he wants them or not And so on. I'd just buy a charm for a funny girl who loves me. Who really loves me. Wouldn't that be nice?

Okay, the WriteFae kept poking at me, so I finally posted a Chapter 2 of my Bicorn saga https://archiveofourown.org/works/87771131/chapters/232597696

>>101628 >momster and grandmomster >auntster and momster

>>101684 Kiki in the harem you say

>>101606 I'm sure you can get some talisman or trinket that starts burning in the presence of evil or something. Just don't walk by the local fox shrine without wearing fire retardant clothes

>>101689 Bitch needs to clip her nails

How can a fox be evil if I want to eat with her lay on her lap?

>>101689 anon already has a perfectly calibrated dowsing rod for detecting evil women. in his pants. (it's his dick) (evil women are attractive)

>>101691 evil is well known to be seductive

>>101564 You must limbo under the cheftaur. Kiss the cook.

>>101695 Note that the difficulty level increases when she's pregnant.

>>101694 Temptation is the straight-flying dart of evil. Her surest weapon.

>>101696 True, you will probably forget what you're doing and just hug and praise her, preventing you from ever turning off the ravioli pot over there.

>be good >at least one god, and at least the best god, sends you a divine entity perfectly sculpted to fulfill your existence, and give you purpose in fulfilling her >be evil >some focks or reptillian neverdowell wants to make you her protegé in failure

>>101699 >To fail is only to change the way! Kids these days don't understand that it takes gusto to keep going in spite of not succeeding! You can't take over the world until you're the hegemon of the realm! You can't become hegemon of the realm until you've got yourself a loyal army and a well-established estate! To build an army and earn an estate, you need to do many great deeds! To do great deeds, you need to do mediocre deeds! To do mediocre deeds, you need to do minor deeds! To do minor deeds, you need to get dressed and go outside! And I'm not doing that, there's absolutely no way I'm doing that!

>>101700 Brilliant.

>>101699 Yeah, but the bad guys get to have so much more fun when they start hamming things up. Plus they get to hang out in lairs. Good guys don't get lairs.

>>101703 What about the Batcave though?

>>101699 >gold dragon always wants to go help starving children in Australia >red dragon just wants to sit on you all day Evil is way less effort.

>>101705 Yeah but imagine how giddy and excited the golden dragon would be after a day of good deeds. Much better than the languid red dragon doing the same thing all day.

>>101704 Hideout, big difference, you don't scheme in a hideout.

>Come to a lamia's noodle house (she is cute) >order a noodle soup >she asks if you want an egg in it >when you say yes she says "The egg separates the ra-men from the ra-boys"

>>101707 Yeah, you plan in a hideout.

distract dragons with shiney so you can run away

>>101628 Houri and Cupid. I need to be overdosed on love before the authorities deem me fit for returning to society.

>>101708 She's funny too

>>101694 I'm goon, pay me, feed me and give me something to do and I will

>>101683 Why not have both? >get a kunoichi wife >build an impregnable fortress together >surround it with top-grade weapons, magic spells, other defense systems so no mindflayers or vampires will ever get to you two >the goberment hates you too as taxing people armed to the teeth is much more difficult >good thing there is no goberment in monster world, so you can build a chem lab and sell every chem imaginable to the mamono, human, angel and everything in-between

>>101605 Just because a woman is strong and intimidates you with her glowing red eyes doesn't mean she is "evil". There is nothing evil about a malef. On the contrary she is one of the good characters, since despite she is the ruler of an entire kingdom, and wields unimaginable power, she prefers to take a laissez-faire approach and only intervene when absolutely necessary instead of meddling with people like humans or some other mamono do. Malefs are also some of the best wives, as they just cut the crap and take their man and have the most passionate sex with him instead of having those autistic moments like some other monsters do.

>>101719 It's ok anon, you'll marry the vampire of your dreams some day. I believe in you.

>>101720 But I choose malefs.

>>101710 What constitutes shiny? Gold/gems? Rare artifacts? Bait anon clad in expensive armour? A mirror? A creeping coin?

>>101675 And don't forget potions of invulnerability, enchanted necklaces of no need to breathe, rings of adept fingering, micro portals for detachable parts of all sizes... The possibilities are limited by only your imagination. And the advertising budget. So if you want to make money, hire a ratatoskr to help you advertise your business in the local newspapers.

>>101719 They're good girls

>>101723 >rings of adept fingering Please take off your rings while fingering. Ms Unicorn would greatly appreciate it.

respect werewolves

rape werewolves

werewolves rape

Take werewolves out (on a date). Kill werewolves' (bad mood). Break werewolves (hymens). Shoot (cum on and inside) werewolves. Throw (birthday parties for) werewolves. Poison werewolves (with your love). Cut werewolves (out from unhealthy habits). Eat werewolves (out). Pierce werewolves (with your cock). Overwhelm werewolves (with your scent). Annihilate werewolves (in bed).Burn werewolves (with your passion).

where wolves?

>>101730 There, wolf. There, castle.

Ms Dryad caught you looking at her burl. What do you have to say for yourself?

>>101730 How wolves?

>>101733 They are weak to tummy tickle.

>>101734 Be gentle with them.

I wanna go gambling

>>101736 Better decide what species you want to be in debt for the rest of your life then. Remember anon, the house always wins.

>>101736 Is she about to put down an epic royal straight flush?

>>101739 Considering the cards are nonsense slop, i highly doubt it.

>>101737 Good old succ. She can be trusted.

>>101739 could be the "demon cards" version of a royal could assume she has a jack in her hand

>>101742 nah, given the table (and assuming the cards in the air are pard of her hand) shes going for something like a regular straight or flush, and thars not counting the ones we cant see

Spearheading the pony revolution is the only way to achieve transcendence Blanket pardons for all man-made fabrics Thousands of toasters agree

>>101744 I couldn't even begin to decipher what that means.

>>101742 Anon gonna get hand jacked

>>101724 They are very bad (good) girls. Bad to the bone.

>>101744 I have no idea what the fuck you're trying to communicate, please clarify.

>Druella chuckles >”Oh yeah. It’s drulin’ time”

>>101749 lol. I actually laughed aloud.

>>101710 >>101722 My automaton wife's shiny metal ass

>>101749 And then she drooled all over my cock and balls.

>>101752 Druella using ghoul techniques

Anons, i'm at work please do NOT post any lewd images, especially not lewd images of bugs. Else, i'll have to talk to my Abbadon supervisor about it, again.

>>101732 I'm a burly man, what can I say?

>>101758 boog for snoog. not for loog.

thinkin' bout buns

>>101761 That bun holds those carrots like she got ideas after she heard that carrot in Japanese/Zipangese is "ninjin".

>>101733 When wolves?

>>101763 Those are the Hounds of Tindalos.

>>101761 What happened to those carrots?

>>101766 Dipped in Bunny juice.

>>101761 Buns?

bnuyy

>>101761 Same

>>101770 Why are there rabbits on the moon?

>>101773 Japanese believe it to be so

DO NOT FOLLOW RABBITS

>>101775 disregard this and go down the rabbit hole

>>101776 Ignore this person and do not follow rabbits. There is nothing to find down rabbit holes.

It's hip to be square wolves

>>101777 If it gets me a few chesh I might

>>101779 Wouldn't you be happier with one chesh that can duplicate?

>>101780 I would prefer that indeed but is it easy to come by?

>>101780 twins or triplets is a better dynamic

>>101781 With a doppelganger potion or simple cheshire chicanery, yes, I would assume so. >>101782 Not wrong. Rivalshire cats, born with different card suits, is also good.

>>101783 A sea of chesh without the drawbacks

>>101784 >go to chesh to funfair >have fun at the funfair >cotton candy >popcorn >delicious >go to the hall of mirrors with one cheshire >walk out with a dozen cheshires >some short, some tall, some thicc, some skinny

>>101783 >simple cheshire chicanery Beyond duplication, is there a chance this would also include changing out your chai tea with chilled chicory coffee while chortling, chuckling, or chittering out chinese slurs?

>>101705 dragons are just cats with power aren't they

>>101788 what know ye of power?

>>101787 I dunno about the slurs, but she is known to buy chic sheik canes. >Cheshire multiplication She must be a mathematician.

>>101789 The urge to pet qnd qpt is trong

>cheshire multiplication Yeah, just trust the magical contraceptives she suggests, nyahahah!

If you want chesh kids, then wifeshire will teleport the semen out of your balls and into her womb if she has to.

>>101687 Well, somebody has to keep rosters running regularly and clean up aftdrwards.

>>101793 But why? We can just have sex

>>101795 Of course. Its just a funny cheshire last resort anon. Think with portals.

>>101777 >down rabbit holes. Go down rabbit holes Go down on rabbit holes

>>101797 This anon wants to eat at least one of the two rabbit holes.

>>101777 This has to be the smuggest Dormouse I've seen.

>>101800 Who knows why, she’s not getting much action.

>>101784 >get a Chesh girlfriend >one of her kinky plays is disappearing and then multiply for orgies and threesome with her clones >after a time you realize that her clones often display different fashion, some are thinner, other are more well endowed, others look older or younger and such details >they don't really seem like clones >you ask your girlfriend about that >she says that it's to spice up things a little she makes some details in her clones >in reality she can't clone herself, she teleports her sisters, aunts, mom and other family member into the mix and calls it cloning

Weeb chesh for a weeb anon

>>101805 westaboo Inari for weeb anon

>>101806 I don't find it repulsive but I never saw what a westaboo looks like

>>101807 Look at the office fox! She is totally a real, normal fox lady in an office, not pretending in her home office.

>>101806 westaboo inari who recently woke up from 1000 years of being sealed, and now likes pizza, baseball, and revolvers. and her husband too, of course.

>>101808 She's cute. I think I'm missing the point

>>101807 cowgirl outfit, usa bikini

>>101811 Westaboo is for USA?

>>101812 Often yes.

>>101807 Heres a few examples

>>101807 Ochimusha but she dresses up like a Roman legionnaire.

>>101815 those are called romaboos, and im sure wehrboos need no introduction.

Hours of making love to a young Pharaoh and basking in her petite body's inner sunlight in the cold desert kingdom night

>>101817 go to bed your highness, its getting late. also, please keep your raunchy fantasies in your journals, the rest of us does not want to read them.

>>101806 I'm no weeb but I want a few inari like that.

>>101819 you've got a perfectly good red fox at home

>>101817 I get you, but I'd like her three feet taller and with some more muscle on that tan body. Also, she should have at least D+ cup size tits..

>>101821 Her, too.

>>101773 Old Buddhist legend from China and Japan where they believed either a God or the Jade Emperor himself got so moved by a selfless rabbit that they put them on the moon. Which is a weird place for a rabbit because we all know there’s whalers on the moon, but there ain’t no whales so they tell tall tales.

>>101745 >>101748 UNDERSTANDING IS A THREE-EDGED SWORD

>>101808 office fox makes sure the company uses strictly software with fox in the name, citing auspicion of ancient lore and principles of feng shui same reason all the floors are made of polished stone and your office is between hers and everything else

>>101825 UNDERSTAND UNDERSTAND

>>101827 THE CONCEPT OF LOVE

>>101817 I want to make babies with tiny brown undead

>>101828 me at the compulsory eros reeducation camps

>>101804 This privilege should be for a sibling, not a boyfriend

>>101804 i canonize this post

>>101832 >Cheshire nods sagely >Has a cannon wheeled in >Despite all the rest of the circus trying to stop her, she manages to fire it at that post >THERE IS A THUNDEROUS REPORT >Tiny flag pops out of the cannon <"pow!"

>>101829 >smug bratty loli Pharaoh demanding you consummate the marriage without delay >smug bratty loli Pharaoh insisting she's already old enough to carry your heirs

Another chapter. Things have been slow since I've been enjoying the weather. Still hanging around though. https://archiveofourown.org/works/49777792/chapters/232754321

Is it me or the site is dying at times?

>>101834 Dude, she's literally the sun, so just trust her ya big lug.

>>101837 >it's the power of the sun in the palm of your hand quote from anon copping a feel on the pharaoh

>>101834 >you don't believe her one bit as you've seen enough cases of people being lured into underage sex then extorted under the threat of arrest

>>101837 I want to cum inside the sun

>>101840 Bottom left it is!

>>101838 >quote from anon copping a feel on the pharaoh My hand grabbing a loli Pharaoh's ass cheek and upper thigh

Gentlemen, I have a question for you. Would you hold a monster girl's hand if she asked nicely?

>>101843 ms tentacle if there's a wetnap at the ready

>>101829 This but including her servants too

>>101829 This but including her servants too

>>101843 Better at least buy me dinner first, geeze.

>>101847 Maybe something less formal than a full dinner to get started?

>>101835 >Things have been slow since I've been enjoying the weather Heatwave is not cool

>>101848 That's it, start slow. I won't even see it coming when she slips her f*ngers between mine. The pyrow approach would be extremely effective against me.

>>101843 Yes, it's my ideal first meeting

>>101835 my day is now good ty

>>101845 >>101846 That's a lot of servants

>>101850 >pyrow sleight of hands a.temporary tattoo before grabbing yours >eventually ask why she's holding your hand all of a sudden >"Why, you afraid of being marked? Like I'll stain you with my girlness?" >spill spaghetti >"Hmm, good point. Maybe you should be worried. Let's see. OHMYGOD"

>>101843 winterstown girls hold hands and ask for forgiveness

>>101684 >>101835 Wow, we're getting a lot (relatively) of writefag activity lately!

>>101843 Not until at least the third fuck-session. I don't want her to think I'm 'easy'

I woke up and had to floss my teeth with some stupid plastic wire instead of using anupubes, life is not fair.

>>101865 Not something ever thought i'd read, but here we are.

>>101865 >>101866 Bristly hairs, those.

Would you marry a snake, knowing what comes after? Could you really build the dungeon of her dreams? Glad to see axem's back to drawing

>>101865 Insane mental damage during work hours, I need paws for recovery

>>101684 >>101835 anubis.moe didn't pick these up.

>>101843 If a Jinko not only offered, but politely requested I touch her beans, I would have absolutely no reason to refuse.

>>101869 I mean, I almost built a treehouse with my friends once. We kind of gave up but we started. I'm sure I can start on a dungeon too.

>>101871 Takes a while

>>101875 Not that much usually.

Imagine resting on big kot lap while drinking... I should consider jinko more

>>101877 As long as you're not driving.

>>101877 Consider Jinko ear scritches. Jinkos are tall and thus need more ear scritches than short girls.

Consider donating yourself to a shark sanctuary

>>101880 im donating myself to the human sanctuary for sharks

>>101881 >Sharks watch a bunch of documentaries about humans >"They're destroying their habitats! We have to DO something!" >Start setting up human sanctuaries to save the species >Human sanctuaries that out to sea >And contain naught but cute boys >"We're helping!"

>>101869 G-d said I shalt handle the snakes, who am I to object?

>>101884 Snek ladies are cuter when they have snek hair. There. I said it. What we were all thinking!

>>101850 I wonder how seething jealous wyverns get when they see tsundere bitchy dragons handholding and smiling with that dopey look. >She doesnt even treat her man right! Im much better than her and give you rides all the time! And yet she gets to hold hands and interlace fingers with her man while I cant with you? How's that fair?! >Because you dont have hands you retard >Why does she get to have hands and not me?

>>101883 >>101881 Now what could a shark sanctuary for humans possibly offer me, a human? I’m all ears, shorks.

>>101888 The answer is sex with sharks

>>101878 Jinko is so fucking hot she makes me want to merge without looking.

>>101889 That does sound nice… Do they got TV?

>>101890 Be careful anon, you might end up rear-ending her, and getting into those kinds of accidents always leaves permanent consequences. Her trunk's never going to be the same if you bump into her.

>>101891 They have TV, yes. But shorks love Seaquest DSV and you will end up having to watch it more than you'd expect.

>>101855 >ask the gyarubrained pyrow any question >she doesn't answer, assumes a hidden statement of consent in the question, and sexually abuses you >and then gets mad when you ask the question again still looking for an answer she also got angry the other day, when she asked "are you hungry" and i said "no", and only after an hour of arguing she told me that she was actually trying to ask me if i want to go eat at a restaurant or not. what the hell is up with these mamonos? are their brains wired the wrong way?

>>101897 >Older >She's like 30 tops Ok larper.

>>101880 I've already donated my body to science.

>>101878 I wouldn't, endangering people or my wife is evil. >>101879 I do. Big ear, big fluff and also a lot of brushing time. It would be detrimental to my work and sleep time

>>101900 Would put the collar on and become this shortstack’s guinea pig. It’s not a mind control collar or anything right.

>>101900 >Put the collar on her Ahah I'm incharge of the evil lab now

Grem fastening me to an operating table. The LOVE LASER slowly creeps up the space between my spread legs until it will inevitably ZAP ME WITH LOVE. >”no mr anon i expect you to love!”

>>101906 She’s not a lab, she’s a labradoodle, and she’s not evil. She just gets nervous around explosions.

>>101883 telling ms jinko i'm endangered

>>101909 Jinko you are a tiger not a tiger shark.

>>101910 she's sympathetic to conservation efforts

>>101911 This is just a scientific way of saying she wants you to fuck her.

>>101913 trust the science

SHLORP SHLORP SHLORP GULP

Those fucking cats.

>>101916 >fucking cats Yes, that's the plan

>>101917 >hands >not paws JESUS WEPT

Perhaps I should go to church with shark... and not give into my throbbing biological urges.

>>101919 Then came the honeymoon... >She's NOT faking it!

>>101918 <hands did not summon us <it was the... desire

>>101920 The most satisfying part of the night was biting anon. And now you know how it's done. Don't do it. >

It's Friday and auntsters know it, do your best at work today and you will eventually become and you will have a lot of little cousins soon

Why are sharks such shameless sluts.

>>101924 They’re sexy and they know it.

>>101924 Name a better way to get a man to ignore the "keep your arms and legs within the hull at all times" rule.

>>101926 Cheeseburgers?

How to change mouse sensitivity?

>>101916 Yes, they must be fucked

>>101929 No, the manticore is pure and innocent. Only headpats and snuggles. And sometimes platonic butt bongos.

>>101930 You can't give all the segg tonthe tail, it's mean, she's bio engineering her pussy just for you, use it when she's ready

Are manticores the sharks of the land?

>>101932 Manticores don't want you to know this, but you can completely immobilize them by flipping them upside down.

>>101933 But then their manti panties (their manties) will be on full display

Auntie Core arriving for Friday

>>101928 Inject her with an aphrodisiac. Once changed, mouse sensitivity cannot be lowered.

>>101846 >Pharaoh and Anubis lolis raised together to become queen and head advisor >you're marrying the Pharaoh so you're marrying them both >the Anubis is an uptight model student type and questions getting physical right away >"U-um... your highness, maybe we should wait a few more years..? Aren't we still too young to perform such... maritial d-duties? And his p... m-member is probably far too large for us..!" >the Pharaoh can't wait to be an absolute sex demon and encourages her to have fun being co-wives and getting fucked

>>101932 i support mantiweek

>>101931 I would never seggs a manticore at all! They are too pure and innocent for that. What kind of sick monster would have sex with such a sweet girl?

>>101935 Auntie go home, incest babies are wrong

>>101941 it's not incest if it's just the tailpipe

>>101941 It doesn't count if she's your aunt

>>101941 Shhhh... just let it happen

>>101941 >wearing condoms with your auntster This is worse than physical abuse

>>101939 shark week is this month guys. this month. wow. isnt that so cool.

>>101941 If it's so wrong, why does it feel so right?

>>101941 You can't spell cousin without "sin"

>>101932 More like the lapcat of the wastelands

>>101940 Me, could not resist for long

>>101923 I have today off though

>>101954 Then get ready to get loved all day long

>>101952 more like the waistcat of the laplands

>>101954 Remember to drink and grill responsibly, Burger bros.

>>101954 Drink plenty of water to avoid dehydration

>Cooking? >That's just applied chemistry >It's just food science secret 5/5 chef.

>ask 4mon /ck/ to rate my cooking >post video of myself eating a can of spam without even heating it up

>>101895 asking a human if he's hungry while you're wearing a skirt or have exposed cleavage is at least insensitive levels of misguidance

>>101963 are you hungry, though?

What would happens if you mere-lizard a Malef Dragons?

>>101965 it's pretty similar except sometimes she does the naked apron thing

>>101964 im cold and hungry...

>>101965 loyal minion or reformed villain, depending on your tastes

>>101962 Minotaurs understand the need to proteinmax.

>>101969 ideal for when you're lost in a labyrinth

>>101970 >Ooo the Princess is waiting for me >Ooo I have this golden thread to retrace my steps SHUT UP NERD, GET COW’D.

>>101967 Careful about saying cold

>>101971 >so...come here often? anon to the mino at the bar (roughly halfway through the labyrinth)

>>101974 This one seems nice. Dangerous. Could kill me in 1000 ways. But nice.

>>101975 How can you say her butt is nice when it is completely obscured in the pic?

>>101976 Cause she looks tall enough for me to walk up and hug my face into her soft mino cheeks.

>>101976 A butt is qualified in how comfortable it is for your penis, correct tightness of the entrance, squishiness of the insides, etc.

>>101977 >”This anon butt bongos with his face!” <“what an advanced technique!”

>>101978 I would also add capacity, how much it can hold until I'm satisfied

>>101978 I judge mine by how much I want them on my face. In the mino's case, very.

>>101978 Yeah but you know what most culinary experts say: “the first taste is always with the eyes”

I love taking walks outside at night, carrying my spell rifle shooting magnifying spells at baphomets.

>>101982 In this case it should be by tact too

Happy 4/7, USAnons. Make eagle harpies feel loved, and comfort your hounds after fireworks.

>>101984 >you have to suck the venom out

>>101986 this ungrapes the anubis

>>101985 I'm going to have to drug my dog. This is someone's kink.

>>101956 Eeeeeh yeah can I rest on her now?

>>101965 Less tsun more deredere, always """evil"""

>>101989 you cannot rest while there are enemies nearby

>>101991 if not friend why friend-shaped?

>>101982 Then I'll have to go AWOOOGA the whole time after portals open

>>101991 It's not an enemy, it's a prey to be tamed with ear scritches

>>101991 >think it would be hilarious to go to the area way over your level, tease the local Dire Manticores and teleport back to town right before they can pounce you >proceed with plan, find a trio of Dire Manticores hanging around buttfuck nowhere, doing fuck all >shout "COME AND GET IT" and pull out your dick <you cannot use the town teleport scroll while in combat <you cannot use the town teleport scroll while in combat <you cannot use the town teleport scroll while in combat <you cannot use the town teleport scroll while in combat <you cannot use the town tel Remember: always read the barely visible gray text under item descriptions

>>101995 i don't know if anybody has tried it, but in theory if you had your spawn point set to a callback bed you could save money on teleport scrolls by sudoku-ing yourself with some demonsilver monsters probably wouldn't like watching or letting you do it though

>>101996 >Wisp files her nails nonchallantly as Anon Sudokus >He is cute when he does his puzzles, but she doesn't want to spook him, so she just peeks occasionally

>>101996 gamreule keepInventory is set to off, so please don't try to abuse the respawn points or you'll lose all your items, money and experience there are more fun ways to lose those than death

>>101998 it's not all bad you get to hit on the mamano priestesses and nuns after they revive you

>"those guys just had a skill issue, I can outsmart a few zombies" >five minutes later...

>>102000 Is taking them home on purpose considered outsmarting them?

>>102001 Corpse pussy isn't worth it

>>102002 C'mon, dude. Lotta girls start out alive. Not many love you enough to go beyond that to be with you.

>>102002 It is worthy They are the perfect alternative to survive this merciless heatwave

>>102002 Zombies are the cutest, most honest and purest undead

>>102002 Corpse pussy is worth more than you.

>>102006 I want to suck on some undead titty, I'm a fan of kefir, yogurt and most dairy products in general

>>102007 I want a milkshake straight from the tap

>>102007 If I had an auntster I would be pestering her all day long to suck on her titties as much as I can even if she's not producing milk, I want to suck monster titties so bad

>>101960 >gets all her recipes from a chemistry manual Is this going to be okay?

It's 4th of July, remember to tip your local Cupid school shooter and clap.

>We got new snake and no one is posting new snake You guys are posers

She gets nerfed within the first ep though lmao

>>102012 Who's we? Who's new. Who's snake??

>>102012 >>102013 is this the right thread im here for the encyclopedia

>>102015 >November 3, 2025

>>102011 >cupid blasts the school >everyone hit, no survivors, first true loves blooming all around >except you >blows the smoke off her bow >"No one left in my way."

>>102017 >you give her the tip >everyone claps >Eagle Harpy flies in and perches on the flag At last... Freeedom...

Spending the 4th on July with you auntster! She will teach you how to make her own special fireworks in bed

>>102019 this is a vtuber

>>102020 Also July 4 is not a date they celebrate in MGE

>>102019 But we are supposed to spend it with the whole family